Time for myself, but I don't like it.

I drove up a near by "mountain" yesterday to take pictures for class. The scenery was very beautiful and I just stood there for a while looking. I never think of this place as beautiful....so much traffic and stress, but it's nice to know that when you climb up a little bit, you can escape it for a little bit. I wish I wasn't alone there though. It would seem like a good spot to relax on your own, but I wish I had someone with me. School yesterday wasn't too well for me. I felt like I had taken a step backwards and that it was just the beginning of the semester. It sounds odd. The semester is over in two-three weeks. I'm just not happy at the moment...I'm excited for school to be over...but I'm dreading August 25th, 2009, or whenever school starts again....I'm thinking ahead to when I'm gonna be unhappy again.

I'm at home now drinking tea. Trying to get ready to do some serious work for tomorrow. I am doing better now...still have a stuffy nose and sore thoat, but no fever!

Hope you are all doing well<3

I Have Become Comfortably Numb

I am sick once again. This time I had a pretty bad fever, but I am feeling a little better at the moment. I didn't go to school today and I am not going tomorrow. If this was a month or two ago, I wouldn't be okay with myself. School is incredibly important to me, but it has come to a point where I don't care as much. I still care about doing well, don't get me wrong, but....I am more important than school. My relationship with school has become something unhealthy, and I think it is time for me to not care as much. There are people in class...who get by, even though they don't do anything. I try so hard, but sometimes it doesn't matter. So it is time for be to not care. I don't care. I have a little bit left of this semester...it ends in May. I'm just gonna try to do my best...whatever happens..happens. So yeah...I got sick again. I was sick during my spring break (post below). I thought I got better...and then it just hit me again, but worse. I hope this is were it will end.

I am gonna try to post more often. I really miss it. When you are so into school, its hard to post...but I'm feeling optimistic today, so we'll see.

Breathe, breathe in the air

Today I had to walk to school in the rain cause my mom had forgotten to give me my keys back. I was rushing because I was late, but it was still nice to walk. It was raining hard on my way to school, but hours later, when I was walking back home, the sky was so clear and blue! But it was very cold!

I'm tired...but I don't want to sleep...I don't want my Saturday to end.

I've been working on school crap all day. I have a crap load of crap to do tomorrow. School hasn't been all to great. I like my classes a lot better this semester...but my studio class is just weird. I don't feel like I fit in. Everything I do in that class feels forced. I'm not enjoying myself at all. I dread going to school...ehhh.

It's 2:35 am....I'm sitting on the couch....watching the Australian Open while checking random things online. I'm super tired but I don't want to sleep...this is the only time during the week that I can watch...so sad -____- I'm waiting for the Baghdatis vs. Djokovic match. I want Baghdatis to win....my dad and I always cheer for him haha~ GOOD LUCK!!!!!!~<3